Gone, completely round the bend

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I missed out on a family get together when we went to the Victoria Falls.


Like our trip, it was an impromptu thing…my brother’s 40th. A break-down at one of the big mines meant he was up from Johannesburg overnight. Wow, just the other day, he was a blond, tiny tousle haired snot…then an annoying brat. Later he borrowed our motorbikes to ride around Fort Rixon, then the landrover and now he is a middle aged, rather soft around the middle dad of two wonderful girls. Well, that’s how I see him…I wonder how he sees me? My sister apparently had plenty to say about how she sees me…
…gone completely round the bend. And she has good reason to think that, I suppose..after all, I don’t use soap or shampoo any more…only borax and coconut oil. I shave using a paste made from sugar and lost 30kg eating fat. I insist the cholesterol story is all nonsense, that older women with higher cholesterol live longer and am treating my husband’s cancer with a combination of green juices and Rick Simpson Oil. And my book, well, she doesn’t think much of that at all. (Good show I use a pen name, hey.)
Until yesterday, I didn’t really think about the reason why she has kept her kids away from me recently, but I can see her point. I miss them, they are great kids. They decorated the wall on my veranda, talked to my chickens and we made things…salads, flower arrangements and those folded paper sculptures. We took photographs and distorted them on the computer, played the piano…
Her and I were always the closest, we didn’t have to talk much to communicate and could always pick up where we left off, even after fairly long separations. As kids, we only had one horse, so we both rode it together. We slept on the same side of the rondavel. We looked out for each other.
I have changed or reverted, rather, I guess. I’ve been deliberately allowing myself to become the real me I hid for so long, trying to conform. For many years, people told me to stop day dreaming, to join the real world, get my head out of the clouds. I reached adulthood thinking it was wrong to dream up crazy things or have strange ideas.
For years, I thought I really looked at things, investigated everything until I discovered one day that I COULD lose weight and that I’d been lied to, about how. I discovered that psoriasis can be chased away with diet rather than the cortisones that made me fat and stupid. I went off gluten, stopped drinking milk, increased my fish oil. I bought water and milk kefir and kombucha. I eat fermented vegetables almost exclusively; bone stews. I don’t use bug spray or any garden chemicals; put diatomaceous earth on the dogs to chase away the fleas…Yeah, I’m crazy, but alot thinner and alot happier…

Veranda exhibit

 

Please have a look at my books, they are not that bad…you will find the links on my “book” page on this blog…

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13 responses »

  1. Good on you for reverting to the real you – It’s the best feeling ever!!! I wouldn’t change me for the world!!
    Mum’s psoriasis has almost gone too – in her case it was potatoes and anything with gluten: like bread. She eats gluten free now, has lost weight slowly – the correct way and generally feels great.
    I’m gradually giving up anything containing gluten and I’ve cut right back on dairy…getting there slowly and noticing the difference already.

  2. Oh wow…how interesting!
    Gluten is in absolutely everything. Very hard to avoid. Here in NZ it’s easier to avoid if you’re serious about it but typically it is more expensive because its part of that ‘organic’ movement. We just try and make everything fresh using natural ingredients.
    It’s a lucrative industry in the uk and they make a bundle out of it…a shame for the genuine gluten intolerant folk

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